


What Do You See

by Jena Bartley (jenab)



Category: Soldier of Fortune Inc.
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2002-07-31
Updated: 2002-07-31
Packaged: 2018-01-08 13:20:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 589
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1133131
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jenab/pseuds/Jena%20Bartley
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Margo and Benny Ray's thoughts on each other.</p>
            </blockquote>





	What Do You See

Margo

You are cleaning you guns again. Your hands moving carefully, lovingly over them. Do you know I come down here to read just to watch you? I bet you didn’t. 

You are an amazing man. And so complex. So much lies beneath that calm surface. It’s been a challenge to try and figure you out. You are an attractive man but seem so unaware of it most times. In battle, there is no one else I want to back me up. 

Your persistence in always watching over me is infuriating and reassuring at the same time. I’ve never had a guardian angel before. I’m finding out that I enjoy it. But I won’t allow you to coddle me. 

What do you see when you look at me? An attractive woman able to hold her own in battle? A friend? How about a lover? You treat me as a sister, a friend. I’ve never seen desire for me in you eyes, or felt it in your hands when we touch in battle or training. Do you see us as lovers? Has that ever occurred to you?

Ah. You are probably wondering about Matt and I. I thought there was a chance at a relationship there. Now, I know that isn’t what I want. There is still an attraction there, but I think it will always exist. It’s a physical attraction with no foundation for a lasting relationship. 

Even if you don’t see me as a lover, I’m content with our relationship. Lovers come and go, but the unique friendship between us is very rare. 

 

Benny Ray

Do you know how beautiful you look sitting there? The look of concentration on your face as you read. Sleek dark hair tucked behind one ear. Your book resting against one raised knee. My hands are busy with the familiar ritual of cleaning my guns but my eyes are watching you, covertly. And I can’t help wondering what do you see when you look at me? Comrade in arms? Loyal friend? Guardian angel? There are so many words to describe me. So many words to describe our relationship. A relationship that fits no normal boundaries. 

Comrade in arms? Oh, we are definitely that. I trust you completely to watch my back. To back me up in a firefight. Just as I know you trust me to watch you six. 

Guardian angel? You deny you need one, saying you can take care of yourself. No arguments here. But you still need someone to look after you and I need to protect you. I can hear you now. Yes, it’s because you are a woman. My mama taught me to always protect the ladies in my life. 

A loyal friend. That goes without saying. And it’s both ways, lady. You are a very close friend. But I find I want to be more than your friend. I want to be your lover. I want to move our relationship to another level. 

But I’ve seen how you look at Matt. I know there are feelings between the two of you. I know that deep down you know that relationship will not work. So I’ll wait. I can wait for a very long time. You already know how patient I can be. 

When you look at me, do you see a future lover or just a friend, a comrade? Maybe one day you’ll look at me with desire and not just friendship. No matter what, you will always be a friend. And I can live with that.


End file.
